May 2013
7 posts
a brain should come with an off button...
May 21st
2 notes
May 19th
1,522 notes
May 10th
116,794 notes
May 7th
60,166 notes
May 5th
2,017 notes
May 3rd
51,694 notes
It's funny when people think i'm normal...
May 3rd
1 note
April 2013
17 posts
I always get annoyed by the smart inspirational...
And them I’m like damn..I actually needed that…
Apr 30th
5 notes
Apr 30th
17,596 notes
Apr 21st
58,722 notes
Things i'm glade I made it to after a night out..
..the couch… The bed would have been victory
Apr 21st
4 notes
Apr 13th
22,057 notes
Apr 12th
101 notes
My neighbor is walking around in his house..
Talking to his parrot  and i’m thinking at least he has a parrot..
Apr 12th
1 note
Sometimes I'm so annoyed cause I can't taste my...
I feel like aahhh avocado… avocado rocks..
Apr 12th
4 notes
Apr 11th
423,547 notes
Dear person that annoys the shit out of me at work
If you come any closer i’m going to kick you in tha face in tha moterfucking face
Apr 9th
5 notes
Apr 9th
880 notes
On my epitaph...
Just like New York she never slept… Till now that is…
Apr 7th
4 notes
That awkward moment you realize...
You can’t find the banana you left in your car…. 0-0   - ——-
Apr 5th
6 notes
1 tag
Apr 5th
1,299 notes
Apr 3rd
179,164 notes
Apr 2nd
2,391 notes
Why the hell do you take so long the WHAT'S APP ME...
Sorry Tumblr. I had no where else to go…
Apr 1st
1 note
March 2013
26 posts
Mar 31st
5,803 notes
Mar 31st
4,323 notes
Easter: a day for stuffing your face hoping Jezus...
Mar 31st
3 notes
Mar 31st
21,629 notes
Mar 30th
1 note
I have great respect for all the dancers around...
You physically voice the feelings we have inside
Mar 29th
4 notes
We need to make room for poop...
In this guy girl story I am human…
Mar 24th
3 notes
Mar 18th
684 notes
Somebody hold me!!
Anybody? noo? o.k back to work then…
Mar 13th
2 notes
Wauwze...Just called my boss on a sunday and...
I AM…YOUR COMPANY! shieetzz…overtime gets the best of us…
Mar 10th
4 notes
When asked what type of women I am
I hope to answer one day …’ a real one’ 
Mar 10th
3 notes
Well....the crooks are out...
Mar 9th
I've come to realize that not every body has time...
its a sad truth very sad…
Mar 8th
2 notes
with alcohol the key is to know when to stop...
I obviously don’t have that key…
Mar 8th
4 notes
It's always great when you wake up...but your face...
Mar 7th
its funny how a guy can sense you switching to...
sorry papi.. aint no body got time for hesitation…
Mar 7th
3 notes
“Let someone love you just the way you are – as flawed as you might be, as...”
– Marc Hack (via thefreenomad) sHIEET…
Mar 6th
56,244 notes
aguardiente with my sister...
what life’s about 
Mar 6th
3 notes
I want to throw the computer out the window
but I wont cause then I can’t go on Tumblr and then I wouldn’t have a life therefore throwing the computer out the window equals suicide  and we can’t have that
Mar 5th
2 notes
When I was young I used to enjoy cartoons...
Nowadays  its a mentalF*ck
Mar 5th
Mar 4th
1,045 notes
Dear spam...I think its time you stop asking me..
1. if I would like to lose weight like Brittany 2. If I would like a new loan approval 3. If I would like to enlarge my genitalia  4. If I would like a free sample of some obscure drug thats hitting the streets these days…
Mar 4th
2 notes
i'm addicted to this damn phone...
Mar 3rd
3 notes
Mar 3rd
55,080 notes
That last jagerbomb was totally unnecessary ...
Mar 3rd
5 notes
I get an email from travelocity saying...
‘We miss you, here’s a coupon code’  If I could reply I would say… send me some mulaaaaa b*tches!! Happy primero de marzo!
Mar 1st
2 notes